Today we had a wonderful appointment with Dr Kim at ABC Pediatrics. He has a lot of experience in international adoptions, and it really shows in working with him. He was extremely thorough in exploring our daughter's history, and in understanding her current state. He was honest and direct about his thoughts, and respectful about listening to ours. He was encouraging without candy-coating things. In short, he left me feeling that we're in good hands for her medical needs.
It seems her case is even more complicated than we thought. Or it COULD be. Hard to say until we finish all the multitude of tests that are being proposed. Tomorrow there will be a complete lab workup, and he's going to be ordering a full brain and spine MRI and a genetic analysis. Of course there's the referrals to the ophthalmologist, neurologist, PT/OT specialist, and a feeding clinic. Oh, and he wants a full exam of her hearing to be sure it's ok. Sound overwhelming? yeah, that's because it is.
Yet, I feel calm. Dr Kim told us very clearly what to expect of him - he will be sort of like an overall care manager. He'll tell us which appointment needs to be first, when the tests should be conducted, which specialists are best, and where to go for various treatments. His office will help us haggle with insurance, when necessary. He also said clearly that he will be our advocate to any specialists or other doctors if their findings don't make sense to us or to him.
It's hard hearing all these dismal possibilities for our precious girl. It's overwhelming if I allow myself to go off down a rabbit hole, thinking about a lifetime of care for a medically complex child. I feel confident, though, knowing that we're starting with a great doctor and he'll be guiding us through the whole thing.
Of course, I realize that the biggest comfort for this situation doesn't come from Dr. Kim. It comes from God. He made our daughter, He meant her to be this way and I know that He has a plan in mind. Sometimes God's plan sounds crazy at first, but if you follow Him then He will make it all turn out for your best. It sounds crazy, what we are embarking on. It sounds crazy, I'm sure, to go through all this time and energy and expense to get a kid who many would view as "damaged goods."
And yet, this was God's will for us. So call me crazy, but I believe He's going to make it turn out.
“Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!" - Matthew 7:9-11